The Ultimate Disney Parks Attraction Bracket -- Round One, Day Three
Ain't no place that far.
Y’know, with it being the summer and all, few things would be more refreshing right now than a 50-foot plunge down Chickapin Hill. (You know that’s the name of the mountain in the picture above this paragraph, I’m sure.) But for now, you’ll have to do with living vicariously through riders in the videos below for each of the matchups in the Ultimate Disney Parks Attraction bracket.
Let’s start today’s votes!
(4) Splash Mountain (WDW) vs. (61) Golden Dreams: Yes, it’s time for a version of Splash Mountain — we hardly knew ye — to go up in a matchup. And though some folks may enjoy the California-themed film Golden Dreams, I’ll be voting for Splash Mountain this time around. Will it last for a long time in the bracket? I doubt it, but this time, I feel the choice is pretty straightforward.
Splash Mountain (WDW)
Golden Dreams
(29) King Arthur Carrousel vs. (36) Happily Ever After: Y’know, sometimes, the joy of a Disney attraction is the joy that those around you feel. To wit, I’m not going to act like I would ride the King Arthur Carrousel on my own, or just with my wife. But my kids — especially my youngest — enjoy a good carousel (or a “Carrousel”, I guess), and this one is very good for their sensibilities. It’s not so much that I like the ride, as much as they like it, and sometimes that’s enough for me.
But will it be able to top a fireworks show that ends Happily Ever After? That’s up to you.
King Arthur Carrousel
Happily Ever After
(13) Dinosaur vs. (52) TriceraTop Spin: Two Dinoland U.S.A. rides enter the thunderdome, and only one can reign supreme today. I will quickly and unhesitatingly vote here for Dinosaur, which may feel a bit outdated now — in spite of having a very similar ride style to Indiana Jones Adventure in Disneyland, which I love — but is still a more enjoyable and rollicking ride than the more nauseous TriceraTop Spin. (If you don’t watch the ride, just imagine a roller-coaster mixed with the Mad Tea Party. Yuck.)
How do you vote?
Dinosaur
TriceraTop Spin
(20) Maelstrom vs. (45) If You Had Wings: Listen, to each their own. I know that some die-hard theme-park fans love If You Had Wings. I am not one of those fans, partly because I never experienced it myself, and partly because the theme song is the kind of earworm I can never unhear. (If you don’t know the song, fair warning before you click Play.) Some of you may love it! I hope you vote for it! I’m voting for the Norwegians.
Maelstrom
If You Had Wings
Thanks to all who've noted that typo in the poll between King Arthur Carrousel and Happily Ever After!
I'm going to err on not revising the poll, as Substack tells me that if I do, all the current votes will be removed. So, in this specific case, presume that if you're not voting for King Arthur Carrousel, you're voting for Happily Ever After even if the poll option says otherwise!
Hi Josh - looks like there's a typo where you have Golden Dreams a second time instead of Happily Ever After. Has to explain why HEA is looking so low!