The Ultimate Disney Parks Attraction Bracket -- Round One, Day Thirty

Don't tell me that wasn't...big fun.

I think I’m just going to use the above sub-headline for each successive newsletter in which the Indiana Jones Adventure appears in the Ultimate Disney Parks Attraction bracket. (If you don’t know the ride, I’ll try to explain why below.) Consider yourself warned!

And now, let’s dive into the weekend by starting with some matchups in the waning days of the first round of the bracket. We’re almost at the finish line…of this round. Let’s go!

(7) IllumiNations: Reflections of Earth vs. (58) Donald’s Boat: There’s no world in which I would vote against IllumiNations: Reflections of Earth in this matchup. (There’s no world in which I would vote against it in many matchups, I must tell you.) Sorry, Donald. You’re out.

IllumiNations: Reflections of Earth

Donald’s Boat

(26) Magic Happens vs. (39) Pixar Play Parade: Two parades enter the thunderdome, but I’m going to stick with the Pixar Play Parade. I’m partial to the parade, and also…well, listen, this is very much a Me Problem. I warn you that up front.

But here’s the thing. Every time I see the title of the Magic Happens parade, I think of that very random sight gag in Forrest Gump where a pickup truck with a “Shit Happens” bumper sticker is driving along before it’s T-boned by another car. I don’t know why this is what I think of. But it is. Magic Happens, sure, but not in this matchup.

What do you think?

Magic Happens

Pixar Play Parade

(10) Indiana Jones Adventure vs. (55) Jumpin’ Jellyfish: So, the sub-headline. First of all, obviously I am voting for the Indiana Jones Adventure, in spite of its frequent downtimes (it’s a technologically complicated ride that doesn’t always work right).

Also obviously — for those who don’t already know — there is an Audio-Animatronic of Indy, and he speaks, and he doesn’t have Harrison Ford’s voice. No surprises. But one of the pre-programmed lines that Indy says at the end of the attraction is that sub-headline: “Don’t tell me that wasn’t…big fun.” He pauses before “big fun”, and while I don’t know the name of the actor offhand, I give kudos to the man for sounding just as displeased at having to say “big fun” as Harrison Ford presumably would be.

Anyway. Vote!

Indiana Jones Adventure

Jumpin’ Jellyfish

(23) Mad Tea Party (WDW) vs. (42) The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh (WDW): Because I only ever got seriously into Disney theme-park lore in the 21st century, I don’t have any serious anger or antipathy towards the Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh for replacing Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride at the Magic Kingdom. And, as we have already noted, I am not a fan of spinning rides. So Pooh gets the vote for me.

But what do you think?

Mad Tea Party (WDW)

The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh (WDW)