The Ultimate Disney Parks Attraction Bracket -- Round One, Day Fifteen

Brakes? Brakes! Where are the brakes???

I hope you all had a wonderful Father’s Day and are prepared to celebrate today’s big day appropriately! (I, of course, am referring to the 45th anniversary of everyone’s favorite lazy cat Garfield! He’s going to be voiced by Chris Pratt in a new movie! When two of Pratt’s co-stars from Parks and Recreation — Nick Offerman and Aubrey Plaza — were right there and far more appropriate to play Garfield!)

Anyway. Matchups! First round of the Ultimate Disney Parks Attraction bracket! You know what to do. Scroll down to start voting!

(3) Living with the Land vs. (62) Journey Into Imagination with Figment: I will here note that words matter. To wit, if any of you are dismayed that the Journey into Imagination attraction is seeded so low and facing off against Living with the Land, please note that in this specific matchup, you are voting between current attractions. So this is the version of Journey into Imagination with Eric Idle and “the animated little fucker”.

Which is why we all know Living with the Land should win, yes?

Living with the Land

Journey Into Imagination with Figment

(30) Turtle Talk with Crush (DCA) vs. (35) The Seas with Nemo and Friends: Some of you will say that the two versions of Turtle Talk with Crush do not merit separate seeds in this bracket. I will remind you that…well, it’s my bracket, so I make the rules. Honestly, while the placement of the Epcot version makes sense — that Turtle Talk is in the same pavilion as the Seas with Nemo and Friends dark ride — I like the layout of the DCA version and its presence in the Animation Building a bit more.

However. If only for the awe-inspiring effect of the very real aquarium opening up to viewers at the end of the Seas with Nemo and Friends, the Epcot dark ride gets my vote. How about you?

Turtle Talk with Crush (DCA)

The Seas with Nemo and Friends

(14) Horizons vs. (51) Five and Dime: Five and Dime is a very charming live musical show, but Horizons is…just one of those big, beloved rides that holds sway over so many of us, even if we didn’t get to experience it in person. Horizons for the win.

Horizons

Five and Dime

(19) Star Tours: The Adventures Continue vs. (46) Innoventions: Innoventions is one of those areas — either the one at Disneyland or Epcot — that really should have worked a lot better than it did. For a lot less money, you can experience similar science-based activities at your local museum or science center, and it doesn’t feel quite as outdated as Innoventions did.

For that alone, I’ll vote for the new Star Tours. How about you?

Star Tours: The Adventures Continue

Innoventions