The Ultimate Walt Disney Company Performances Bracket -- Round Two, Day Seven
Who’s ready for the weekend? I know I am, he said typing this on a Monday but still sure of the accuracy of those words. Anyway, even though it’s a Friday, and I know you’re all celebrating the 17th anniversary of the final true episodes of Arrested Development (the final four episodes of season three aired on a Friday in 2006, and I didn’t have to look that up — I wish I did!).
But even if you aren’t, you should vote in the matchups. Right now!
(2) Michael Caine, The Muppet Christmas Carol vs. (34) Owen Wilson, The Royal Tenenbaums: And so we bid adieu to Owen Wilson as the matches start today. I get why Michael Caine will win, and as much as I love The Royal Tenenbaums (a film a few of you do not seem to love, which makes me sad), I would also vote for Caine. But Wilson didn’t get memed into oblivion without having great material (which he co-wrote), and his performance is surprisingly emotional at points. Great work, but I know it’s not enough to withstand the man who would be Scrooge.
(15) Ed Asner, Up vs. (18) Mandy Moore, Tangled: It’s Asner for me. This one’s not very tough, but again, I am not the biggest fan of Tangled. I could see Moore doing well in this round! But that’s up to you. What do you say?
(7) Johnny Depp, Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl vs. (26) Geoffrey Rush, Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl: No matter who wins, someone gets canceled. I’m kidding! (But I for sure do not want some argument about these guys’ personal lives, bumps and all, in the comments. That’s a no-go.) Keeping in mind that we’re limiting ourselves to the first film — Rush is kind of more fun in the third film, once he’s revived and a little less evil — I will vote for Depp. Both very scenery-chewing performances, both memorably flamboyant, but the first time we met Jack Sparrow was pretty remarkable.
(10) James Earl Jones, Return of the Jedi vs. (23) Tom Hulce, The Hunchback of Notre Dame: The power of the human voice will win the day here, and I have little doubt that the actor whose voice is so impossibly iconic as to have voiced two very different fathers (and to have served as the voice of CNN for a while) is going to win. But I kinda wish Tom Hulce wins this one. His tender, tremulous voice does a great deal to humanize Quasimodo in The Hunchback of Notre Dame, and his take on “Out There” is really quite remarkable. He does a lot more than Jones does, but…again, when your voice is as memorable as Jones’, you don’t have to do much.
Anyway. Up to you. So vote!
I went with Tom Hulce, lost cause or not. His performance nearly brought my dad to tears, which is no mean feat. I've been supporting Hunchback of Notre Dame whenever it made an appearance in these brackets, and this is no exception.
I interviewed James Earl Jones (who I kinda look like) decades ago and his voice is still vibrating in my body. So that vote was a no brainer (sorry, mean ol' Amadeus!) I also voted for MyCocaine and cancelled Jack Sparrow.