Wrapping Up the Ultimate Disney Parks Attraction Bracket
Pieces of eight? In THIS economy?
Well, my friends, we made it. We did it! World’s best cup of coffee. Congratulations.
Oh, wait, sorry, that was a non-Disney reference. Get out of here, Will Ferrell! Anyway, kidding and late-summer Christmas references aside, we have finally reached the end of the Ultimate Disney Parks Attraction bracket. The battles were hard-fought, some to the point where I had to resort to doing hourlong tiebreaker polls on The Site Formerly Known as Twitter. 256 seeds entered a vast thunderdome of Imagineering delights, but only one exited the victor of the whole thing. If the header photo or subhed didn’t give you the hint…well, congratulations to Pirates of the Caribbean.
Now, you could say that this was never truly in doubt. I had seeded the Disneyland version of Pirates as the number-one seed to end number-one seeds. It’s the best for a reason. But it only won by eight percentage points, and was on the losing side of the battle against the Twilight Zone Tower of Terror for a good chunk of the day yesterday.
But the pirates have once again looted their way to victory — congratulations to all involved, especially the skeleton of Walt Disney, which is definitely not in the ride somewhere for all of us to find. (What?)
What’s next? Well, for those of you who remain free subscribers only, the newsletter will be taking a late-summer hiatus until Tuesday, September 5. If you’re a paid subscriber, you’ll be getting essays from me each Monday, along with some surprise essays like this one, which was published not one hour ago and served as me waggling my fist at the cloud, as film criticism has to face down the idiocy of MovieTok.
If you’re waiting for September, no worries! That will be when the next bracket starts, and it’s a biggie because it’s a first for me — it’s not a specifically Disney-focused bracket. But Disney will have its place, because it’s the 128-seed Ultimate Movie Musicals bracket.
Get excited. And I’ll see you all…a little later.
Josh, I just want to thank you for putting this together. My husband faced a health scare at the start of the summer that had him in the ICU and has been a long road of recovery. We’ve used this bracket to bring a bit of joy into our lives during this time. It gave us something positive to look forward to each day. He’s much better now, but I’ll always be grateful to you for hosting this and bringing some fun into an otherwise tough time.
This bracket has been a ton of fun; thank you for putting it together, sir!